Marriage: Watch & Learn Folks

Hey everyone! I’m Ashley and I blog over at From A to Z. The reason behind the title is my last name went from a to z and I thought it’d be a cute idea. I love to read, run and eat anything chocolate. I’m a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and decided to write from a talk given a few conferences ago. The topic is called Marriage – Watch and Learn.

I really like this talk because it gives out awesome points that I can understand now that I’m married myself. What does it mean to watch and learn in marriage? I think it means to remember that there are others around you, watching and learning what not to do, but also what to do. Elder L. Whitney Clayton says, “I have observed that in the happiest marriages both the husband and wife consider their marriage to be a pearl beyond price, a treasure of infinite worth.”

Now we know ladies loves pearls. Peal necklaces, earrings and rings. We always have that very excited reaction, the surprised one. We talk about it with our family and friends when we receive such a gift. But that more I thought about that, the more I wondered I’m treating my marriage like I was getting a pearl necklace. Am I happy and excited to be marriage to my husband for eternity? Am I treating him and our relationship with the perfect care? Do I treasure my marriage with all of my heart and soul? Watch your parents, grandparents, neighbors, friends and their marriage. Are they treating it as a pearl?

The next watch and learn is a marriage centered on the gospel of Jesus Christ. Elder Clayton says, “I have observed that couples who have made their marriages priceless practice the patterns of faith: they attend sacrament and other meetings every week, hold family home evening, pray and study the scriptures together and as individuals, and pay an honest tithing. Their mutual quest is to be obedient and good. They do not consider the commandments to be a buffet from which they can pick and choose only the most appealing offerings. Faith is the virtue that strengthens marriage.” I can testify of this. I know that my husband and I can get really stressed out and take things out on each other when we aren’t reading our scriptures daily, attending all three meetings, praying together, and fasting. Having Faith that the Lord can help strengthen our marriage gets us through the tough times.

The next watch and learn is humility. Being humble is so important in your marriage. It helps you learn to serve your spouse and love them even deeper. Elder Clayton shares, “Humility answers softly, and listens kindly for understanding, not vindication. Humility recognizes that no one can change someone else, but with faith, effort and the help of God, we can undergo our own mighty change of heart.” I love that! We cannot change someone, only they can change themselves. But through faith and patience, we can help our loved one become the very best they can.

And lastly, respect. Elder Clayton says, “In wonderful, happy marriages, husbands and wives treat each other as equal partners.” This is so very important to remember. Men need to be respected just as much as women need to be respected. They support each other in areas of interest, they include each other in discussions of finances, concerns and the gospel. They are both human and deserve to be treated well.
Love your spouse as much as you can. You never know what could happen to them in a second. Life has it’s way of determination but if you live making sure your spouse is happy, than you will become happy too.

Read the full talk here.